Mrs Angry feels moved to make another prediction ... her spirit guide is whispering in her ear ... yes, yes ... ah ... aha, really? Goodness me.
In the audience tonight, is there a model for local government, with the initials O and B?
Stand up: don't be shy, dear.
Yes, you in the easycouncil orange t shirt ... I have a message from - from your uncle? Uncle Eric? It seems you are going on a journey. Sorry, Uncle Eric says he wants you to go on a long journey, and never come home. He says you are a fucking disgrace. Tut tut: harsh words, Uncle Eric.
And what is this? Mrs Angry sees that you are going to run away, in shame, and assume a new identity. And then come home and try to sneak in the back door. Oh, but changing your name isn't going to help, though, is it?
Yes, citizens: Mrs Angry understands that there are plots afoot to drop One Barnet.
No, not the programme, the name.
Can't drop the programme: this would be like cancelling Christmas - think of all the tearful chief executives in all those multi-national outsourcing companies, with hankies pressed against their eyes, thinking about their lost bonuses. Too cruel. And some of those overpaid senior officers at Barnet Council would be in big trouble too, wouldn't they?
Some insightful people in the management team and a handful of Tory councillors now think that if you rename, rebrand a discredited concept, you can fool at least some of the people some of the time, and conjure up a wholesome new image for themselves and their shameful agenda, just in time for the run up to May's elections, where certain GLA members that we all know and love are due to get a well deserved hammering.
Mrs Angry would respectfully point out that spray painting a pile of shite will not resolve the problem of the appalling stench of rotting policies, widescale incompetence and endemic moral corruption, here in Broken Barnet.
Still, what fun: a metamorphosis of Ovidian proportions: easycouncil to Futureshape, Futureshape to One Barnet, and One Barnet to ... ?
Perhaps we should run a competition for suggestions?
Yes, let's: the best name will win a weekend at Champneys with Mrs Angry, or Michael Gove. Take your pick. The runner up will win a weekend at the Sandbanks Hotel, Poole, with [name redacted – s40(2) FOIA] - a senior officer of the London Borough of Barnet. (Mrs Angry, shamefully, is not a fully registered data processor, but always complies with the DPA & FOIA, and the European Convention on Human Rights - when anyone is watching).
morning Brian ... bit sweaty round the collar?
ReplyDeleteFuledue Council ?
ReplyDeleteHave easyCouncil, FutureShape and OneBarnet all been the same thing? (Have I missed any names out?)
ReplyDeleteThere was also, of course, the snappy urban-sounding name that also implied competence: BarnetMetPro.
Presumably Brian is viewing your blog today, because he is at a bit of a loose end, and can't go out.
ReplyDeleteThere is no public sector to grit his road today, which he presumably arranges every morning from September to April, "just in case".
hmm, you're right, baarnett, poor old love: should I nip up to his road with a shovel? Can't grit the road as that would be scabbing but I am sure I could find another use for it.
ReplyDeletesomeone do better than Mr Mustard, please, or he will have to go to Champneys with Michael Gove ...
ReplyDelete... on second thoughts, that will serve him right, so let me declare him the winner.
ReplyDeleteLess of that Mrs A. I thought "fooled you" was rather good as like One Barnet it wasn't obvious at first what was happening.
ReplyDeleteAnyway I have a new name today inspired by the Rams blog - "New Barnet" absolutely no scope for confusion there.
Thursday, 4pm:
ReplyDeleteWe were all going to comment on Mrs A's "Winter Wonderland" posting - but it's been pulled.
Wonder what it said.
sorry, baarnett: I was overexcited, and had an attack of premature blogulation. Normally thinking hard about Michael Goven or Jeremy Clarkson does the trick, but I was overcome by the moment. Post now available for your viewing pleasure.
ReplyDeleteGove not Goven, obv. Oh dear.
ReplyDeleteWell, Govern is rather better than Gove, at the moment, since that is what he is going around doing.
ReplyDelete