Monday, 29 August 2011

Mrs Angry's Honeymoon

Matthew Offord MP: 'Experiencing Tropical Storm Harvey on my recent AFPS operation', according to a recent twitpic ...

Mrs Angry has been thinking enviously about Hendon MP Matthew Offord's recent trip. You know, the one which meant he missed the riots, and the recall of Parliament. Obviously this was not a holiday, as Matthew explained, he was there on Very Important Parliamentary business, as part of the the Armed Forces Parliamentary Scheme. Not a holiday. Hard work. No time for cocktails - or anything else - on the beach. Places to go, uniforms to wear, medals to be won. No, not Afghanistan: Belize.

You know ... looking at pictures of Belize one can hardly help falling in love with the place. So beautiful.

And talking of falling in love ... as you know, Mrs Angry is engaged to be married to a certain senior Tory councillor and Cabinet member - although she is not supposed to talk about it in this blog, so do keep it to yourselves. If he ever gets round to setting a date, and arranging our honeymoon, well: how about this for a suitably romantic spot ... seen above, no, not the top picture, not sure where that was taken, think it must be military accommodation somewhere, on a rare break between ops - second picture down and below? Yes, the Mayan Princess Hotel, in San Pedro, Ambergris Caye, Belize ...

Ok, it's only three star, but Tory councillors have to live within their means, you know, on the miserly allowances we pay them. But just imagine ... relaxing on that pink and white balcony, with its rather slippery looking white tiles, watching the sun setting over the Caribbean, perhaps as special force patrols battle furiously with narco-terrorists, assisted by square jawed Tory MPs in knitted combat gear, with curiously clenched fists and a fixed expression. Fabulous.

You may also know that Mrs Angry is a very keen scuba diver. Well, I say keen - bit out of practice, but always interested in exploring new locations & polishing old skills: and anyway, oh, yes - I think I may have mentioned the attractions of Belize's world famous diving spot, the Great Blue Hole ... guess what - by an amazing coincidence, Mrs Angry has noticed that this particular hotel happens to be the perfect venue for anyone planning to visit this wonderful spot:

Mayan Princess Hotel - Sea view acommodation with your scuba diving package in Ambergris Caye, Belize

"Every room of this mid-range hotel comes with a spacious balcony that offers a view over the ocean, perfect for the magic of sunrises over the reef. The Mayan Princess is an enchanting and well equipped hotel that Splash Dive Center uses to accommodate our guests when we make trips to the Blue Hole of Belize."

Did you know that, according to his entry on the website:

"When not on the water Matthew also likes to be under it as he is a keen scuba diver and qualified up to the level of instructor. Over the years he has dived in several Mediterranean countries, the Caribbean, the Maldives, in the English Channel, off the coast of Cornwall and too many quarries and lakes in Lancashire and Cumbria!"

What an awful shame, therefore, citizens of Broken Barnet, and voters of Hendon constituency, that MP Matthew Offord, on his Parliamentary trip to the tropical paradise of Belize, would have had no time in his busy schedule for such self indulgence, is it not?


Mr Mustard said...

What on earth makes an MP ( you have demoted him to councillor Mrs A ) think he can play Call my Bluff with a blogger. The truth will out.

He no more stopped those drugs from entering the country than Mr Mustard did from the comfort of his bank holiday sofa.

Mrs Angry said...

I think, Mr Mustard, that you are confusing my fiance with the MP for Hendon. As it happens, yes, it was Mrs Angry who threw the bucket of water over him, and since my councillor friend found out about my trip to Belize our engagement is off too.

button55 said...

Mrs Angry
I know that you are a girl,but us boys used to have the action man with the realistic hair and a tag we pulled from his chest to make him talk,and i still have that collecting dust in my attic.He is going to be posted to the HCA offices FAO Matthew offord so he can cuddle up to it in bed every night..Ahhh.Matthew is going to be a spy tomorrow..

Mrs Angry said...

well, button, my annoying cousin with the suicidal parachuting Action Man (see Ashes to Ashes post) also had an deep sea diver Action Man with which you could have hours of fun in the bath. I wonder if you can say the same about our intrepid MP? Deep sea diver Action Man also came to a sad end, I seem to remember. Tragic loss.